Baby, Baby, Baby, Ohhhh and a Serious Thought

Hooray! I've started posting to my other blog again. I know it's weird to have two blogs but it just works better for me. I like this blog to be my serious one. I like it to focus on my life and my family. Diligent Joy is the place where I leave little bits of my heart. Confessions of a Beauty Aisle Addict is just a fun project that keeps me on my stylish toes and helps me maintain my girly sanity during motherhood and married life.

I love makeup. I love buying it and trying it. I started Confessions because I knew I'd love talking (well, writing) about it as well. Harper likes makeup, too. She did mine just last night.

You can see that for Harper, makeup application is serious business.

Anyhow, sometimes I think Harper has Bieber fever. Either that or she thinks looking a little like Justin will make her cool. Just look at this post-nap hairstyle.

Cool or not, Harper J is one smart girl. This morning she figured out how to open our child-proofed cabinets. Yay (not really). She thinks she is pretty fancy now.

I keep trying to clean out Harper's clothes and shoes. I can't let go of them, especially the shoes- like her birthday shoes, her Halloween shoes, and the ones she wore to our wedding. I'm hoarding them- along with some of my favorite Harper clothing- in my dresser drawer. Everything else is in plastic bins in our garage. Every time I put something away, my heart breaks a little and yes, I usually cry. 

I love Harper's clothes. They are so little and so cute. I love to hold them and smell them. I have a hard time accepting the fact that she will never wear them again and I think I worry that if I let them go I'm losing a bit of the memories we made while she was wearing them- precious, precious memories.

I've kept the majority of Harper's stuff. It's as if I'm actually incapable of getting rid of it. I think that is because something inside me- something deep in my soul- knows that Harper won't be the only little girl in our family. While I live in denial and doubt about other children, this part of me waits patiently. It knows that when the time is right, our family will grow, no matter what protests I may be making now. This part of me knows that my selfishness will not win and that I'll find the strength to be pregnant again someday (someday= many days from today). I think this is the same part of me that consistently dreams about a little girl named Emersen. 

(If I know you personally and you steal my name before "someday" arrives, I will never forgive you. Ever. I'm not kidding. Neither will Harper. She really wants a little sister named Emersen.)